Communication

I’ve lived in China for six years. I’m almost finished with an entire master’s degree about communicating across cultures. I should be pretty good at cross-cultural communication by now, right? If anything, the only thing this experience and all of those classes has taught me is how common miscommunication is. Simply setting up a time to get together with a group of students–figuring out when and where and for what–involves a circular process of indirectness and many text messages. And along that very circular path, there is likely to be at least one instance of misinterpretation or miscommunication. One thing six years in China has taught me is to recognize the warning flags that I and the other party just might not be on the same page. So when a student, with whom I thought we’d established that we’re just getting together for games, sends a text saying…

I remember you don’t like to eat tofu? And you don’t eat pig’s foot?

…I realize that perhaps there is a plan to cook, and I may just need to clean my kitchen before the students arrive. However, at least one important piece of information has already been communicated: Miss Katherine is not a fan of gnawing on the foot of a pig. In addition, while tofu in China is just as common as and has as many varieties as cheese in America, you can safely say none are considered particularly delectable by Miss Katherine. Tofu makes its way into my introductory speech on the first day of class every semester when it’s appropriate to directly say I do not enjoy it. That way, come mealtime with students, when the direct communication of that preference is not nearly as appropriate, students already know not to order a big plate of steaming hot tofu. I guess I have learned a thing or two after all…